Victoria Jackson

It is rare that I take celebrities seriously. No, really: no matter how often I write about them, I just generally do not take famous people seriously. They’re like dolls: you hug them and tuck them in with you and pretend they have personalities, but inside, you’re pretty sure there’s no “soul,” whatever that means. And then sometimes, they say things that make you swing around, suddenly realizing that you’ve been cuddling up with Chuckie every night and you are horrified with yourself for ever letting them play with your other toys.

Now, we here at The Gloss have a difficult time trying to figure out who and what is “The Worst.” Patti Stanger, for example, is the worst in many ways. This is the worst birthday card. This job advertisement is the worst posting we have seen. However, we now have The Worst, and her name is Victoria Jackson.

The former Saturday Night Live performer, now a super conservative blogger (the photo above is from a Tea Party rally), decided to be a complete and utter asshole by going on a public rant blaming the absolutely devastating shooting in Newtown, CT on — ready for it? — abortions!

“My friend Jim Riley posted: ‘Wasn’t the Connecticut killer just doing what abortionists do every day?’ It’s a wonder we don’t have more 20 year old “dads” doing what women and doctors have been an accomplice to for years in America. When you forget the TEN COMMANDMENTS, people, THIS is what you get.


“Obama dramatically wiped a tear as he said, “The majority of those who died today were children — beautiful little kids … They had their entire lives ahead of them — birthdays, graduations, weddings, kids of their own… YEAH OBAMA. SAME AS THE MILLION BABIES YOU HAD ABORTED THIS YEAR. ARE YOU CRYING FOR THEM?!”

I audibly said, “What the fuck?” in public upon reading. Seriously: I think I understand nothing about human logic. Gun control laws: okay, I guess that’s applicable. Mental health care: an important topic when discussing issues like this. Abortion: not applicable. Not remotely applicable. Not remotely appropriate or applicable.

Dozens of people dead, that’s what “you get” for not following the Ten Commandments? I refuse to go into a religious argument — after all, no matter how many times you point out to anti-choicers that there are plenty of things they don’t follow in various texts, they refuse to listen — but I will say that hurting people is generally rather wrong, and that includes this cruel comment. The relatives of those victims are heartbroken, and to use their heartbreak for her own views on a completely different issue makes it obvious that she cares and feels very little for those families. How can you stand up for what you believe are living people when you have so little respect for human beings?

Yes, I fully understand that people are angry and confused about what happened last week; I am most certainly included in that category. There aren’t really words to describe that particular horror one feels when hearing the details of what happened, so reacting dramatically makes sense. But blaming unrelated parties isn’t the answer, and trying to utilize this as some sort of ridiculous platform is fucking absurd.

A bunch of little kids and a bunch of adults have been murdered, and abortion has nothing to do with it. Using their murders to disperse your social ideals is not all right. I would have the same response if somebody who was pro-choice used this as a soap box, because that would still be completely unrelated, insensitive and not all right in any way. So congratulations, Victoria Jackson: you are officially the new Worst.

Photo: White House Official Photographer/